Nasty by Simon Doonan
Feb. 9th, 2010 11:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rainbowunicorn_reads"I well remember our first Christmas together. I was about six. On Christmas Eve, Narg came to wish me good night. Popping her head round my door, she found me wide awake and in a high state of excitement. I was convinced that I had just heard the sound of sleigh bells tinkling in the distance. Since Narg was no stranger to the concept of hearing things, I thought she would be a good person in whom to confide such a piece of information.
"Listen! Can't you hear Santa's sleigh bells"? I asked with a misty-eyed, festive look.
"No, I can't, and neither can you!" said Narg bluntly as she clutched her mauve, rubber hot-water bottle to her ancient bosom with her white-knuckled, blue-veined hands.
"But I'm sure I-"
"There are no sleigh bells, because there is no Santa Claus."
Beat.
"Merry Christmas!" she shrieked and was gone."
If you're fond of essays by the likes of David Sedaris, you'd probably enjoy this one. I'm still in the middle of reading it, but so far, I'm liking it. It's not as lol-able as the Sedaris books, but Doonan is so charming and likeable that even if nothing major is happening to him, you get this feeling of having instantly bonded with this cheery, quietly funny guy. He has this way of describing people, and events in that aw, shucks manner that just endears me to him.
What I think so far: 7 unicorns
"Listen! Can't you hear Santa's sleigh bells"? I asked with a misty-eyed, festive look.
"No, I can't, and neither can you!" said Narg bluntly as she clutched her mauve, rubber hot-water bottle to her ancient bosom with her white-knuckled, blue-veined hands.
"But I'm sure I-"
"There are no sleigh bells, because there is no Santa Claus."
Beat.
"Merry Christmas!" she shrieked and was gone."
If you're fond of essays by the likes of David Sedaris, you'd probably enjoy this one. I'm still in the middle of reading it, but so far, I'm liking it. It's not as lol-able as the Sedaris books, but Doonan is so charming and likeable that even if nothing major is happening to him, you get this feeling of having instantly bonded with this cheery, quietly funny guy. He has this way of describing people, and events in that aw, shucks manner that just endears me to him.
What I think so far: 7 unicorns